Baby Toupees: The Next Generation in Humiliating Baby Photos

“The Buzz” Features Article,
Times Herald-Record

Writing Portfolioon September 8th, 2010Comments Off
Published in the Times Herald-Record

Is your baby suffering from low self-esteem as a result of early pattern baldness? Does he weep when he looks in a mirror and glimpses his shiny, bald head? Do you find yourself compelled to cover your child’s baldness with cute little bonnets and hats?

Well, fear not, parents.

Baby toupees are here to save your child from the humiliation and trauma of life sans hair. In four glorious styles that mimic the popular celebrity hairdos of the day — Donald Trump, Lil’ Kim, Samuel L. Jackson and Bob Marley –  your child will not only have luxurious locks but also will be the coolest baby in the playpen.

Not only that, but your child might learn a thing or two from these masters of finance, music and the silver screen. Never underestimate the power of osmosis.

Take Hayden Carlock, 14 months old, who was sporting a trendy Donald Trump comb-over at the Galleria at Crystal Run last month.

If he had spoken, his words might have been “You’re fired!”

But he only grinned and ripped off the toupee.

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